I want my life.

I want a good life.

I want to get out of this house. I want to do more with my weeks. No more sitting around most nights. I want to work hard to provide for myself. I want my woman by my side in life. I want to go to church on Sunday. I want to cook dinner every night. I want to take yearly trips to the beach that I save up for. I want to go out on the weekends. I want to play my music at clubs and bars. I want to paint beautiful pictures. I want to love her with all of my heart every day of my life. I want to go on adventures and find new and beautiful things. I want it all.

I have changed. Michael Ford is alive again. The hardest part is trying to enjoy it when there's such a hole in my heart.

Please be strong and see me for my beauty and for my redemption. It takes a strong person to overcome themselves. And I couldn't have done it without you. I miss you.